Clay.

WitheringImage by Carnoodles via Flickr
Lines… It’s become a tangle of lines to pacify myself. A weaving I can’t comprehend or fashion into a usable garment to clothe exposed parts… There is no space within me that I haven’t ventured – stomped, slashed or distorted. I can’t be me – not ever, not really. I am what I need to be in the moment – or to be soft for another. Only when in argumentation, debate or reciprocal sex – am I me… The rest is but a reflection off a mirror image – not of my own, but of whomever I think is passable. When I drink I am reminded of self- she burns. She leaves me on fire with ideals … and wants. I become a petulant child who screams into the thickest parts of myself and like glitter – aspects of me rise like moths in tall grass… consuming me. So very splintered… I keep thinking one day … all of me will find comfort.

A friend of mine told me that when he was inside his wife – he could feel more than just her wetness, or form… He felt her… He felt her breathing, her pulse…

He smelled her…
 
He was connected in a way he couldn’t put into words or find words that could convey the deepness of what he felt ; sensed or just knew…

Is that love? Or another form of love? … I know many- felt a few.
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Interlude

Satan on his way to bring about the downfall o... inner web of me 
loosened lines have lost all hold
trot ridden prick-full conceived bastard of a poorly paid whore
tripped in the thick of word 

silver lined tongue;spun lies like lovers
twisted in your disrepair 
deep seeded yet barren fool of compromise
head held low; fallen king of nothing gained 

nothing lost... you were never even a whisper to my truth







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bitten through

flap flapImage via Wikipedia
Been a while since I openly crept into my lobe ....

Burnt out chastened whore
Smearing your scent
Leaving your words like soiled panties
Held down 
Clinging to the floor of wicked whim.
Callous cunt with no remorse – to never be shed
Slit and slipped beneath your skin…
You never felt me sleep.


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Love is cuntish ... past reflections. Did you miss me ?

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